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  • Writer's pictureDonnese Monique

Broke Down & Blowing Up (#J2FA50)

4/29/21 - In just 8 Days I will officially be 50 years old. That's right! My 50th Birthday is one week away. I lost 1.3lbs this week and that's 35.5lbs since December 1, 2020. This has been a very stressful week for me at work (end of the month) and usually that would trigger lots of snacking and comfort food for me to make it through the day. But I'm very proud of myself because I didn't succumb to my normal stress eating. I've been really practicing "Stop, Challenge and Choose" which is a technique I've learned through the Habits of Health program to help me make healthy decisions/choices. My healthy goal weight is 2 more pounds, but my lowest of the lowest goal. bringing me to 50 pounds shed, is 14.5 more lbs. I'll be starting a Step Challenge, with some folks at work, on May 3rd and it runs through the end of the month. Let's see how close I get to that 50lbs!! LET'S GO!!

It never fails! As soon as I get into a routine, find a fitness class that I like, a way of eating that WORKS for me, blah, blah, blah, something always happens to foil my plans, discourage me and/or simply get me off track. I then found out that in addition to exacerbating an existing condition I was diagnosed with December 2017 - Capsulitis of my second toe on my

right foot. I was advised to stop wearing heels, tape my toe, wear a toe pad and start wearing flats more. The orthopedic doctor also said it looked like a bone in the top of my foot was fractured. What the heck?!? There's no way! She gave me a cortisone shot and a shoe boot to wear for several weeks. In the months that followed, I started experiencing pain in my heel. Are you kidding me?!? Now that I'm wearing flats more I developed Plantar Fasciitis of the SAME foot. This is ridiculous!

The doctor gave me yet another cortisone shot, put support tape on my heel, advised me to get specially made arch support insoles and to wear a night splint to keep my foot flexed while sleeping. She also recommended that I buy expensive shoes with built in arch support. I had to buy "orthopedic" shoes in my forties! I was devastated and JUST BROKE DOWN!!! Both of these aliments, on top of the arthritis in my knees and my knees filling with fluid every single time I tried to increase the intensity of my exercise, was extremely frustrating.

I had more injuries and ailments now, than I had when I was dancing regularly. I thought maybe these injuries were a result of the beating my body had taken from years of dancing and the fact that I was getting older. I thought I had to accept and deal with it. Jesus!!

Not only was I broke down, I was TIRED! Tired both in the sense of "I'm Done" and "Can't take this anymore" and literally lacking energy. I know they say you feel more energized when you exercise, but I had begin to notice that I fall into this same trap at the same time EVERY YEAR!! I was able to work out consistently and stick to a program January - June and then when July and August rolls around, I get busy with summer activities/events/cook outs/vacations and then I FALL SLAM OFF. Then Lord knows, by the time September rolls around, I've gained back all the weight I had lost and ruined everything I had accomplished at the beginning of the year. And then like clockwork my self-diagnosed condition - S.A.D. (Seasonal Affective Disorder) would kick in. I believe I suffer from Fall and Winter S.A.D. The symptoms include:

- Oversleeping

- Appetite changes, especially a craving for foods high in carbohydrates

- Weight gain

- Tiredness or low energy.

YEP!! I experience all of these except for the Oversleeping. I definitely don't do that!! I wish I could sleep in on the weekends like I used to growing up. I always got my eight (8) hours back then! If I only got six (6) hours at night, I made sure I took a two (2) hour nap during the day, even if it was broken up into 6 - 20 minute power naps, lol. These days I'm happy to get at least six (6) hours of sleep. I can't seem to sleep past 6:30a or 7a on both my days off and on the weekends. It SUCKS!! I try so hard to sleep late, but my eyes automatically open I guess when the sun starts to rise. We could go out on Friday night and I may not get to sleep until 2a. So of course I'm hoping I can sleep until 10a. But NOPE! My eyes open at 6:30a/7a despite. And even if I went to bed at a decent hour, I would wake up 2 or 3 times throughout the night, so I'd have broken sleep. And broken sleep to me feels worse than not getting enough sleep. I would stay in the bed as long as I could, but I still would not feel well rested.

A good friend of mine invited me to join her walking in the park in the mornings. I knew I needed to do something! And walking in the morning, getting some fresh air was a GREAT idea. We were walking 3 mornings a week and I was feeling good. We were walking 3-4 miles each time we went. The movement was good for me! Then another girlfriend invited me a dance fitness class called The Get Down, Monday and Wednesday evenings. I loved it! I was dancing again! I didn't realize how much I missed and needed it. I got my mom out walking with me too twice a week. We even found an indoor spot to transition to when the weather was bad or it was too cold outside. BUT, here we go again! I had just gotten into a grove. Then I went to my follow-up doctor's appointment for my foot and since I was still experiencing pain in my heel, the doctor put me in a full on boot for several weeks.

I took a break from everything for a few months, but eventually got back into walking again in 2019. And then, as fate would have it, COVID hit in 2020. For several months I was too afraid to go outside and be around other people, but my girlfriend soon convinced me that I'd be okay walking outside, and so we started walking the perimeter of FedEx Field where we had more space to practice social distancing.

I was walking, trying to be mindful of what I was cooking and eating. We were biking here and there and we weren't eating out like we were accustomed to

every week, but guess what? Instead of maintaining or losing weight, my weight was going up! When I went over the 180 mark I said, Oh Hell Naw!! I refused to continue on this pass. I was less than 20lbs away from 200 lbs. I could NOT believe it.

Something had to change! And that's exactly what I did. I am so thankful for Jackie Knox-Brown's post sharing her weight loss success on Social Media because this Optimal Health & Wellness program is AWESOME. I committed to it and promised myself that I would lose the weight by my 50th birthday. I initially set out to lose 50lbs by my 50th Birthday. I am close! And if I don't lose another pound in the next 7 days, I am still over the moon and extremely proud of myself. I feel so much better, sleep through the night; still wake up at the crack of dawn though, lol. And I think I look better too, lol.

Check back next Thursday which is MY 50th Birthday!

Please Like, Follow, Subscribe and Share my journey with others. Until Next Week!

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